The Grub, the Dragonfly and our Friend Kendal

Sometimes, words don't come as easy for me as other times. Nonetheless, the thoughts and concerns stare me square in the face begging for me to speak them out loud.. Today is one of those days. The excerpt below is from a book I read a little while ago and I wanted to share it with anyone who stops by. It's a beautiful story and touched my heart deeply. It so reminded me of one of our homeless friends ~ Ms. Kendal. We have not been able to talk to Kendal in a few weeks and she's playing heavy on my mind, as well as Lance's.

The Grub and the Dragonfly ~ exert from the book titled: Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda by Dr. Les Parrott

Imagine a colony of grubs living on the bottom of a swamp. Every once in a while, one of these grubs is inclined to climb a leaf stem to the surface. Then he disappears above the surface and never returns. All the other grubs wonder why this is so and what it must be like up there, so they counsel among themselves and agree that the next one who goes up will come back and tell the others.

Not long after that, one of the grubs feels the urge and climbs that leaf stem and goes out above the surface onto a lily pad. And there, in the warmth of the sun, he falls asleep. While he sleeps, the carapace of the tiny creature breaks open and out of the grub comes a magnificent dragonfly with beautiful, wide, rainbow-hued, iridescent wings. But then, he remembers the commitment he made to those behind, yet now he knows, he cannot return. They WOULD NOT RECOGNIZE him and HE COULD NOT LIVE in the place where he started.

Like the lowly grub, each of us fears what is beyond our current circumstances. There is comfort in knowing what to expect, even if it is not as good as we think it could be. The power of this innate desire to hold on to what we know can compel a mistreated or abused person to put up with misery in order to have the 'payoff of knowing what's coming'. So it stands to reason that when we wallow in regret, we fear what would happen if we were to let it go. That's why so many of us hold on to regret for so long.

Like the grub, we can't see what life would be like if we were to let go of our should-haves, what-ifs, and if-onlys. BUT, like the dragonfly - who gains a new perspective (sheds its layers); we can reach beyond where our past has brought us and enjoy the glory of a better day.

We can move forward - IN FACT - WE MUST MOVE FORWARD - OUR FUTURE DEPENDS ON IT.

Kendal is an amazing woman lost to alcohol, depression and the streets. She is bright, beautiful, generous and very, very funny. She can also be very disheartened, depressed (suicidal in fact), angry and mean when she is 'under the influence'. She is an alcoholic struggling to find her way back.

There are obviously many reasons things have been so hard for her ~ but the bottom line is that as she has gotten older, her ability to trust, let alone trust the unknown is all but vanished. Kendal needs the help of people she trusts. Kendal trusts us (Straight Ahead Outreach; Lance Greene & Pat Mishler). Time is running out for Kendal. Her alcohol abuse is destroying her body and has seriously harmed her thought processes. Lance & I are very concerned that if she does not get the help she needs very, very soon, Kendal will become another statistic that the general public will never even know about.

Yes I believe Kendal is close to death. I also believe that Kendal wants to Take Back Her Life. Not the one she has known so far. She wants to take back the RIGHT to a life she can create, a decent life. It is our goal, our desire to help her do just that. But we need your financial support to help her.

We, Straight Ahead Outreach, need funds to be able to assist Kendal. We need your financial assistance to turn this young woman around before it's too late. She is someone's daughter, someone's mother, someone's friend AND most importantly, she is a child of God - just like you and I.

Please take this post seriously. It is a matter of life and death for Kendal. It is a matter of life and death for many. We CAN help Kendal, but we need your help to do this and we need your help now.
Any donation is greatly appreciated and can be sent to:

Lance Greene/Patricia Mishler
Straight Ahead Outreach
7419 10th Ave. N
St. Petersburg, FL 33710
Please provide a return address or email address so that we may provide you a receipt for your donation.

NOTE: Straight Ahead Outreach like a non-profit. All paperwork has been filed for 501C 3 status and we are currently awaiting our formal endorsement

STA and the Story of A Life

What is this organization “Straight Ahead Outreach” (STA) Taking Back Your Life about? The bigger question is: What is the story of a life about? Is it worth reading this blog? Yes. Is it worth your prayers? Yes. Is it worth your involvement? Yes. Is it worth your investment? Yes.

STA, at this very moment, is in labor. The contractions have started and the parents (Lance Greene and Patricia Mishler) are in the delivery room waiting for the birth of a long-awaited child.

That child began as a thought in Lance Greene’s heart, mind and body and has remained there for 23 years. That’s a very long time to think about bringing a child into the world. But this child (plan) took years of attempting to find the right person to bear it with, the right location to rear it, a genuine relationship to raise it in. Tough requirements, but they have been met. Lance and I have been together six years and have a strong, supportive and loving, relationship. We are both up to meeting the challenges of a large, complex family and all that it entails. We believe in each other and our goals are the same. Doing the right thing, for the right reason and doing it because it has to be done.

STA is obviously not about a single ‘real’ child. Rather, it is about a life plan for “all children” (even though they may be adults) to help alleviate their homelessness and to intervene and/or prevent suicide so that they can “Take Back Their Life”. A life they may have been waiting to have for 50 years!!

How does a parent raise a child? After all, many of the homeless are just grown children. Many have never had the opportunity to reach any goal; some have never been given any goals. The reason – is not important. The existence of a life unfulfilled and/or plain miserable is very important. And each homeless person and/or suicidal, deserves the opportunity to realize that they STILL CAN have and enjoy a life.

We, STA, can and desire to, assist these individuals by first leveling the playing field, but not standing “ABOVE” them. We recognize that we were children just like them and we were just fortunate enough to have lived in a better environment that enabled us to progress and grow and avoid homelessness. Not that we didn’t have struggles, but we had the support of our family and friendships that we were able to develop because of our ‘upbringing’. Homeless people have lost their family support. That doesn’t mean their family doesn’t care, they just don’t know what to do anymore, they are angry, they are tied up in their own feelings of failure so they’ve put them out of their lives.

STA maintains that an approach that allows the individual to feel that they are STILL cared about, STILL important, and that their existence IS essential to the world, allows that individual to take that first step again. Of course, they can fall down. When someone is literally learning to walk, they will fall – just like a toddler.

When was the last time someone told you – you are important, crucial, you are cared about? If it was longer than yesterday, you could very well be feeling vulnerable today. Now what if you hadn’t heard that for years? Or if all you’ve heard for the last many years hi-lights the wrong things you have done. I know there are people who say that they’ve never done drugs, drank themselves into oblivion, pimped themselves, stole, lied, or cheated. But I can guarantee you, there have been days those same people have asked God for forgiveness for one of their failings or have begged him to come to THEIR aid. All offenses against another are offenses against God. Period.

Many homeless and suicidals are at their wits end. They have begged God for forgiveness and help, but they don’t expect it. Why? Because they feel unworthy to receive anything good where they are at and because of that believe that nothing can ease their pain or heal their suffering. And trust me, they are suffering.

STA’s mission is to provide an atmosphere for the homeless/suicidals that we work with, that allows them the ‘safety’ to grow and evolve into a positive participant in life. That safety comes from a family atmosphere, not a clinical, political or religious environment. These are real people that we genuinely care about and for. STA educates, coaches, acknowledges and values them, so that when a consequence arises because of their behavior – they learn to view as it should be viewed – a life experience. They have fallen and THEY CAN GET UP. This treatment enables them to acknowledge and deal with an error in judgment. That is what a family does for its own. They help them up when they’ve fallen – for the 1000th time. Otherwise, they end up homeless and paralyzed, unable to walk any more.

It has taken STA 23 years to bring this plan to full-term. It has taken that long because it is NOT just about one child, it’s about a world of children (even though many are adults), waiting to be born – in other words – “Take Back Their Life”.

STA’s plan is literally in the delivery room, waiting to arrive. Months and years of planning and hard work have built the heart and soul of this ‘concept’ion . STA has grown into a healthy, strong, meaningful plan. But we need your help desperately to continue our work and to grow.

In order for STA to continue to help the homeless “Take Back Their Lives”, we need your financial support. It DOES take a city to raise a child.

STA, Lance Greene and his organization, are ready, willing and skilled at the task of reviving and energizing a person’s attitude about themselves, as well as educating, coaching, and preparing them to become individuals that are able to “Take Back Their Lives” and develop into a positive element of society.

Please – look at our website: http://www.mobilecrisis.org

Please make your checks payable to:

Straight Ahead Outreach
2882 Gulf-to-Bay Blvd. # 130
Clearwater, FL  33759
Phone: 865-964-1461
Email: straightaheadlwg@gmail.com
straightaheadpm@gmail.com

Please include an email or mailing address for a receipt for your gift.

With our heartfelt thanks,
Lance Greene and Pat Mishler
And I feel that something's coming, and it's not just in the wind.

It's more than just tomorrow, it's more than where we've been,

It offers me a promise, it's telling me "Begin",

I know we're needing something worth believing in.

~~Harry Chapin from Remember When the Music

It's Time for the work to "Begin" ~ Please help

The Story of The_Kitchen_Table

All through my life, the kitchen table was the place to be. As a child I often got to sit with the grown-ups and feel important. As a teenager, many a conversation about life and love were held at that table. As a young girl the safety and comfort I felt sitting at our table has always been something I’ve wanted to extend to others. There was never a time that a friend or relative was not welcome at our table. And oh, the laughs we shared. When my parents had company, the first place they headed for was the kitchen table for coffee. If it was lunchtime or early afternoon, it was coffee and sandwiches. If it was 8:00 pm, it was coffee and dessert.

When I woke up in the morning, one of my parents was always sitting at the table, ready for me (or one of my brothers) to stumble to the table–not quite awake. The coffee smelled wonderful! Even through their cigarette smoke. My Dad would have KYW news radio on in the background, but would turn it off when I sat down for breakfast. My Mom might be doing a crossword puzzle, but would put it aside and talk to me or ask me if I was ready for the day, did I need anything I forgot about the night before, was I doing anything after school and she’d wish me a good day.

As an adult, oh my! To be an adult (16) sitting at that table was the best. I could say exactly what I thought about things and never be shut down. Oh sure, there were times when my Mom would just shake her head at me and say “Oh come on Patsy! – You can’t be serious” or “You better think a little harder about that”. But I knew she wasn’t mad at me – she was concerned about some cockamamie idea I had about something. At that age, Dad would usually listen quietly, discuss it later with my Mom and my Mom would end up talking to me about it later if she thought it was serious.

When I became a mother, it was so comforting to be able to sit at the kitchen table with my parents. The real world was at last mine and when I struggled to deal with the responsibility and depth of it all, they treated me with compassion, respect and patience, still. It is a memory that cannot be repeated now, one that will never be replaced, but one that can be shared and experienced with others. I’d like to share that with you, so

The door is unlocked, the coffee is on. I’ve set a cup out for you. So grab a chair and make yourself comfortable at The Kitchen Table. I hope to share a sense of family, friendship and fun with you and that you feel free to leave your comments and insights here too! Thanks!